Hello, I’m an overthinker…
I experience episodes of analysis paralysis often. This blog is definitely an example of one of those episodes.
I have been talking about blogging for months and I’m still not ready. Actually, I think God is telling me I’m ready, even though the website is not ready. He’s showing me that I have let perfect stop me from doing things. To be honest, I’ve been afraid.
My past (as well as my apartment) is littered with failed projects. I’ve invested way too much money into craft projects that are currently stuck inside boxes. I loved the idea of writing, but I didn’t want to start something else that I would let drop into oblivion. I also didn’t want to do something that would invite criticism. Yet, the dream of writing a blog would not die.
God has been speaking to me about fear lately. In Exodus 14, the Israelites were stuck between the oncoming Egyptians who had enslaved them for hundreds of years and the Red Sea. Verse 10 says “and they were sore afraid: and the children of Israel cried out unto the Lord.” However in the next verse they started complaining to Moses. This showed that they were not asking God for help, but moaning about their situation.
Moses responded “Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord.” Moses had not yet been told by God how they would get out of this bad situation, but he trusted God. The Lord had already promised that He would take the children of Israel into Canaan and they had already seen Him bring ten plagues to Egypt. Why did Moses trust God, but the Israelites who had witnessed the same wonders not trust Him? The Israelites were focused on the problems, and so they were afraid. Moses was focused on the problem-solver and had learned to love and trust Him. After displaying his trust in God, He then told Moses what to do. God showed His great power after Moses and the Israelites acted in faith.
Now:
Earlier today, I heard the song by Tears for Fears “Sowing the Seeds of Love.” I haven’t heard it in years, but I love it. It started me thinking about 1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love.” Moses loved the Lord. He spent time with God, praised Him, and (mostly) obeyed Him. The Israelites in the dessert spent more time complaining than praising or honoring God. They showed fear because they did not love the Lord and therefore, did not trust Him.
A friend challenged me last week to get my butt in gear and publish this thing. She is the reason I’m publishing a “so-not-ready” blog today. This website is not even close to what I want it to look like, and I’m nervous about saying the wrong thing. However, God has shown His love for me by putting encouraging people in my life. As long as He keeps giving me something to say, and people in my life who will show me love no matter what, then I will be able to commit to this. He will never leave me or forsake me, and I’m so glad He uses others to remind me of this truth.
